There's Gotta Be Somethin' More

OK...so I am two weeks into my summer vacation and I am already starting to feel the blues. Not because I have any desire to get back to work or that I am not relishing my time away from being scrutinized and observed and counted on on a daily basis. But overall, once again, I am finding something lacking. Like my time right now has no purpose. I generally tend to be a "woman on a mission". This summer I really have no mission - no end goal I hope to achieve, just lots of empty time.

I do have lots of trips and things planned for my break and this week I had three days in a row where I did not wake up before 10 or even think of getting out of bed until 11! BUT once again, my goal achieving self can only find joy in these occasions on an infrequent basis. I have not had a complete summer off ie not work or school or super long excursion planned since before my junior year in high school.

Since the fall of 2003 I have been in school or working on a regular basis and now that I have 2 months off with no schedule or set-in-stone plan, I'm going a little crazy. I mean I wonder why you haven't stopped reading now as I realize I just keep talking about the same thing over and over again.

I could bust out a list of "Summer To-Dos" - short term goals to fill the empty spaces - organizing my closet or CD collection, read books to help me out with my classroom management, read books just for the fun of reading books, watch full TV series that I have wanted to watch start to finish, etc etc the list goes on.

My plan for the summer and the rest of the year, is to figure out something to do NEXT summer. Something that will make a difference to someone else. Something that will be a good and productive use of my time. Something that allows some time to check off a few of the above mentioned items. Something that provides my soul time to rest. Something that allows my mind to continue to learn. Something that allows my body to work hard and grow strong.

I realize all you heard from this post is a whining and complaining person who has 2 months off and nothing to do with her time. I want to let you know that I am REALLY excited for this time and it has not been totally horrible. I have read lots of books already, I didn't even keep a count; I have gotten to watch nearly 20 soccer games; I have watched a few Netflix movies that I have wanted to see; I have gone to many local baseball games; I have travelled to Hilton Head and have plans to go to Kerr Lake next week and Charleston a few weeks later; my birthday is coming up; all wonderful things to fill my summer - I just want my time to be spent being productive and being useful.

Well I hope for that to be the last of my complaining. I look forward to the remainder of my summer. Just remember in two months I will be complaining that I have to go back to school and my summertime is over!

The point of this post? I don't know but like I said - This...is my life. Make of it what you will!

Well...I made it!

As I sit here I can now reflect on my first year teaching. Let me just say that if next year is like this year, I really will feel EXTREMELY incompetent and wonder how I ever graduated college!

- About 3/4 of the year, a light bulb went off in my head and I realized that I was doing it totally wrong. (Really, did I need 6 months to tell me that? No, but that is when I stopped being stubborn and realized I had to change my ways to survive.) I went into the school year under total illusionment. Who knew that 7th graders didn't know the appropriate times to get up from their seats to sharpen pencils or throw things away? Who knew that 7th graders will ask you totally inappropriate questions about your personal life? And then, when you don't answer them, they proceed to tell you about crazy things that they do that you never ever wanted to know? Now I realize you have to tell them how to do EVERYTHING or they are confused :(

- I know the value of my teammates! Without the support and assistance from them, I don't know how this year would have looked but I do know it would have been worse! Next year we are all mixed up throughout the school so I will only have one of the people next year. The rest of them are scattered throughout and really far away. It makes me sad to know I can't just poke my head in the door next to me for some reassurance or comic relief or a friendly smile.

- Patience! I thought I had a lot of it but I realize now that it is not limitless. After about 4 kids ask me the same question, I want to rip the head off of the next one to ask. I really don't think there is anything worse than having to repeat yourself 5 and 10 times a day! One part of it is inevitable because I teach the same thing 5 times a day but usually by the 3rd or 4th class I anticipate the questions that they will ask and try to answer them within the directions instead of waiting for them to ask.

- High point!!! At the end of each semester, the computer classes are working on correspondence and the students are asked to type letters to their favorite teachers. I got 4 of those letters this year!!! When I looked at other people's piles I got a bit sad because they had more but from what I hear it is unusual for 1st year teachers to get them so then I was happy again. I think I will cherish those letters - they almost made me cry because sometimes you really don't know how the kids feel about you.

All-in-all this year was a GIANT learning experience! It was really rocky at times and I didn't know how it would all work out but I think it was a really invaluable experience. Definitely not anything that anyone can really prepare you for. Now I know better for next year! Expect more blogs throughout the summer and I promise they won't be about school (at least not all of them!).

Ahhhhhhh

(That's a relaxing ahhhhh not an angry one!)

We are TOTALLY in need of an update!

This weekend was so fun! I got to go to the beach to help celebrate the wedding of a friend from college - my first wedding of the summer - I believe at least 3 more are to come. Anyway, back to the weekend...

So on Friday, after a SUPER exhausting week at school, I decided that I was going to leave RIGHT after school. To accomplish said goal, I sent my kids to their lockers a few minutes early and I shut down my computer, printer, and TV while they were doing that. I grabbed my purse and lunchbox and got them lined up in the hallway BEFORE the bell rang. Once the bell rang, we were down the hallway - they went out to the buses and I walked out the front door! This is something that NEVERS happens for me but Hey! I was going to the beach to see long lost friends - what's a girl to do? REALLY?!

So anyway - man I feel like I will get sidetracked soooo much on this one - my wonderful friend getting married had me stay at the same house as the bride's maids all weekend! This was fantastic for MANY reasons. 1) I didn't have to pay for two nights at a hotel. 2) I got to hang out with/meet some pretty great girls. 3) I was literally 20 yards from the beach. 4) Did I mention it was FREE?

The wedding was held in the NC Aquarium which was kinda cool. You had to walk through some of the exhibits to get to the ceremony and the room where the reception was held is called the Ocean Room. One wall was like being under the sea - glass wall with lots of fish (including multiple sharks) behind it. Totally different from something I would have - should I ever get married - but was really cool and definitely fit Chelsea's personality. Regretfully, I only got to spend about an hour and a half actually at the beach - but I returned home with a pretty sweet sun burn on the back of one of my knees.

This weekend definitely got me excited for the summer coming very soon!

Yep...

To say that this weekend has been relaxing is an understatement and not even exactly the feeling that I am having right now.

Friday night I came home from school and started reading a book. I finished the book at about 1:30 am and was very happy about the fact that I could do that with no worries about the next day.

Saturday I stayed in (well out on the balcony) all day reading another book - which I finished before the sun went down. That night I went to hang out with some friends and stayed up really late. It was fun but very, what's the world "chill"? Without anything exciting? Nice? I don't know - left me wanting more?

Sunday, I proceeded to lounge, lay, sit, nap in the living room all day watching "The Love Saga" on Hallmark. (Some of my all time favorite stories/movies.) I got the apartment cleaned up during commercial breaks and did some laundry. Oh...I even alphabetized my CDs. That was my day.

Today, Monday, a holiday from school, I watched movies in the morning and started a new book this afternoon. Now I am watching Friday's episode of General Hospital - but not really watching because there aren't any good story lines at the moment.

So...that sums up my long weekend. SUPER exciting, right? Although I really really needed a weekend of doing nothing - having no plans, not being responsible for anything - I think I took that a little overboard. I need some excitement in my life. I need some adventure - books and movies can only accomplish so much. As much as I love to imagine my life as it could have been in 19th century England, or the American frontier, or modern day Oregon falling in love with the doctor saving my father from a heart attack, I have to realize that this...is my life.

In this season of my life I am sitting and waiting although I confess I don't believe that I am spending my single life exactly as the Lord has called me to do. I should be spending my time with Him. He will show me where my life is supposed to lead - IF it should lead to a certain someone or something. I feel like I am allowing my life to stay sedentary, almost accepting that this is my life forever. Is that the case? I don't really know. But isn't that supposed to make it interesting? Not knowing what is going to happen?

I don't know how I got a tangent or what the answers to my questions are but I do know that in the foreseeable future I know that I have 8 school days with kids left, a beach weekend in between to celebrate the wedding of a friend from college, and lots of mistakes (maybe a few triumphs) in there as well.

Where am I going? What will I be doing when I get there? God only knows - FOR REAL!

Cinnamon rolls for dinner!

So today was a REALLY long day! The kids are getting SUPER crazy and disrespectful and antsy and ridiculous and my patience is soooooooo gone that I like to pretend that if I ignore them, they will go away - but still not kill each other. This I am afraid does not work - though it doesn't really make it worse either.

This is EOG week and that means that although I don't really have to plan or teach super great lessons the kids are required to sit and be silent for 4 hours for 3 days because of the tests. That means...total chaos and ridiculousness following said testing.

That being said, and my desperate need for groceries, I ended up at Wal-Mart this afternoon. Going in I was just thinking about getting a few random things that I needed on my list - milk, bagels, bread, cotton balls, a pack of gum - not much but THEN I saw the sign for the book aisle on my way to the milk and I could.not. resist myself. I went down the aisle and just started throwing books in. OK so I didn't just throw them in, I looked at the picture on the front cover and then read the back of the book, and THEN threw them into the cart. I ended up with 7 books by the time I was done. I actually had to resist the urge to throw more in.

Anyway so after loading up on books, I went back to my original plan and got some food. I ended up with all of the other stuff - PLUS chips and french onion dip, Rice Krispy Treats cereal (so excited!), and lots of 88 cent frozen dinners. I also ended up CINNAMON ROLLS!!!! Instead of waiting for some weekend morning to make them, I decided I wanted them today, tonight, for dinner and so I made them. Now...I am going to spend the rest of my evening watching TV and eating my cinnamon rolls with a wonderful glass of milk!

Even on the really bad days I realize that some things about grown up life are good!

I am also encouraged by the bookmark that fell out of my book today:
I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13

Oh what's a girl to do?

So...for a while I have been thinking that I should have been born like 150 years before I was. Now you are probably thinking "this girl is crazy. Why would she want that?" I don't really know but I think it probably has something to do with a lot of the books I read.

I get so wrapped up in the horses and dresses and carriages and brooding cowboys and quilting and baking and courting and closeness of families and friends and the focus on the Lord and His plans and the list goes on and on. I also think that I tend to romanticize all of the elements of "heading out west to the unknown". Even though I know about the dangers and the hardships that many of the travelers faced, I still am kinda upset that I don't have a chance to experience that lifestyle.

I did get the opportunity for a glimpse at that way of life when I worked at a historic tobacco farm a few summers ago. Although most everyone else hated it, my favorite days were the days I got to dress up in my 1870s dress and got to churn butter or sing Christmas carols with the children or make corn husk dolls.

So how do I make my life today resemble a life of the past that I really like? I REALLY like indoor plumbing, and my DVR and iPod, and electricity in general.

Oh what's a girl to do?

A wonderful hodge-podge (sp?)

So...it has been an interesting evening!

We had/are having torrential downpours outside plus severe thunderstorm warning plus tornado warning plus hail warning - which my new car (ahem truck) was so NOT excited about! So yeah - that was fun!

Also, LC and I were discussing new names for our balconies. She is going with the island feel so she is going to call hers a lanai. I watch my soaps all the time and they call there patios and balconies terraces so that is what I am going with. Now, even though I am online I have no desire slash time to look up the meanings of these terms to know if they are being used correctly. (It is already past my bedtime for a Sunday night.) So terrace it is!

Now on to the real reason for this post...school!

Of course I brought work home with me for the weekend and of course I waited until about 7 pm on Sunday to get started on it. My students are researching countries in Africa and Asia and are writing a short paper about those countries. Most of the papers start off with a line or two or five like this:

Hello! My name is (insert name) and I am going to tell you about the culture of Japan that I think was really fun to study about and I am really excited to tell you allot about it. So here we go!

Yep!

And then one of my kids wrote about the geography but his concluding line said this:

Hopefully one day in the future I will be able to study about the geography of Japan!

Well buddy, since your whole paper was already about the geography of Japan, I am so happy that I have been able to make that dream of your come true! I mean really. IDK!

Oh and of course I got many papers that were copied and pasted from several websites. Not only was the writing style and vocabulary waaaaaay over the head of a seventh grader, but its chunked in several different fonts and there are underlined portions that are probably hyperlinked. So, yeah! That's what I've got!

And also I just realized I have written - so, yeah - a few times in this post. Not really sure what that means but I'm thinking that things have been so ridiculous that there really hasn't been anything else to say.

Anyway - gotta get to bed 'cause this girl needs her beauty sleep FO' REAL!

School is a place for learning!

So...lots of things happened today at school.

Because this is my first year and apparently I am too nice and I let the kids run over me a bit, I have summer homework. It has been requested/strongly suggested/required for me to read a few books about classroom management and not really write a report but take notes on several of the strategies. So yippee! Both of the books seem like WONDERFUL summertime reading! I. Am. So. Excited. --Can you tell?-- I am hopeful that I will learn a few things that will help me out it just seems a bit silly that this is an assignment. Maintain Employment. Always say "yes ma'am" to the boss.

On to a lighter note, something I learned today from my students - they found a way to get by the server blockers to go to all of their favorite websites that are NOT school appropriate ie: facebook, myspace, youtube, wikipedia, etc. I WILL NOT tell you how they did it because I completely forgot...wink, wink. I am a bit wary of using it because I don't know if Central Office has some way of checking on that kind of thing and its really not that important to me that I would want to lose my job. Again...Maintain Employment! I just thought it was really interesting that these kids can't read and follow simple directions - Complete jump-start. Log-in to the computer but DO NOT DO ANYTHING ELSE on the computer - but they can find a way around a school system's entire computer security system.

So...those are things that I learned today...or will be learning in the near future.

22 school days left til summer!!!!

I guess it happened...

...well as you can see I was correct in my original assumption that my life is completely uninteresting and have few things that people would actually like to know about my life.

I haven't posted anything recently because there really hasn't been anything to say. So let me bring you up to speed and you'll see what I mean.

Kids are getting restless (as am I) because school is almost out - in 5 weeks - 23 days!!!!! I guess that is kind of exciting. My principal has commented that we have to "tie a knot at the end of the rope and hang on tight." I guess that means "hold on for dear life, it could get crazy." I am definitely seeing that happen.

OK...what else?

Oh, I got a "big girl" car today. Its an SUV but the salesman actually called it a truck because apparently in the car business there are cars and there are trucks...everything falls into one of those categories. So...I guess I am a truck driver now! What makes this a "big girl" car? Well, it is loaded with lots of gadgets that I really don't need and some of which I will rarely to never use but they are super cool and fun to have. So OK I guess that is exciting also.

Whatever...if you are still reading this then you are a trooper - you also probably already know about this.

Anyway - til the next time.

How bo-ring!

Um so basically any time I start to tell a fun anecdote or story it ends up being something that happened at school. If you get me in a room with one other teacher - namely the bff LC - I could go on and on. I am sure that anyone who is not a teacher and is listening is thinking to themselves "Why do I care? Why does she keep going on and on?" Well the answer to those questions is: I have no life and that is the one thing that basically fills my days, nights, thoughts, and sometimes - unfortunately - my dreams/nightmares.

Now don't get me wrong, I do other SUPER exciting things like watch TV, read fun books, sit on the balcony and see people in my neighborhood, and have a weekly dinner with some friends in town but even those things are not that exciting to other people.

I do get bored with my life every once in a while but most days it really exciting...definitely a fun adventure! If you can get past my quirky stories of 12 year olds at school, you may get a fun story about the hockey players that live in my neighborhood or the "snuggle buddies" C and I have. The decision is yours!